Welcome to Teablogging.net! This site was created by famous internet celebrity and known liberal @StephanieInCA and is now brought to you by @ShortsandPants (Halden) to chronicle the lead-up to the April 15conservative hysteria Tax Day Tea Parties and to serve as a central repository for low-brow teabag-related sex jokes.
Our intention was to wind down the site following the rallies on April 15; however, like any good tantrum, the Teabag Movement shows no signs of abating. So for as long as Teabaggers, Paultards, secessionists, Randians, fisters, Beckites, etc. continue to gather at parks and strip malls across the country to express poorly articulated outrage and thinly veiled panic, Teablogging will be here, bringing it to you live, and taking the lowest possible road… for freedom.
Around the site, you’ll find MSM and blog teabagging coverage, local Teaparty Infiltration Teams (TITs), aTeabagging FAQ and links to teaparty-related topics trending on Twitter. If you have a post you’d like to see included on Teablogging, email us atteablogging@gmail.comor wander on over to our Contact section.
Janet Porter is being VERY SERIOUS with you. Let’s explore.
I wanted to e-mail my editor and tell him I’m taking the week off. My preference? Play in the snow with my niece and nephew and spend time by the fireplace with family. But too much is at stake to give up now – or even to take a much needed break.
The Senate rammed through socialized medicine, complete with forced abortion funding, and we have to stop it in the House.
So now it’s time for a PRAYERATHON. Especially since, if we enable health care reform, we are essentially “killing God.”
There are threats abound in our post-Holiday America. These are from all sides. Nobody is safe from the possibilities of harm that are massively afoot. We must not treat this subject lightly. We have all seen the effects of terrorism, poverty, civil war, genocide, aristocracy, American Idol, and the like— but there is an even greater evil to be reckoned with. This will kill our hopes dreams, and realities.
Luckily, there is one human being, Allen Quist, who has the rocks to deal with this madness. Yes— Satan is staring us in the face— and he’s liberal.
So why are the liberals worse then terrorism? Allen explains. Read More…
Do you love the Constitution? You damn well should, as it is an incredible thing. Tea Party people also love the Constitution, which is why they are on a mission of VAST importance. Let’s do away with the separation of Church and State, as that is clearly how it is phrased in the Constitution. Rex Rammell, lightning Conservative and hopeful primary challenger in the incredible race for Governor of Idaho sends word. Never mind that he suggested somebody hunt and kill the President this summer, there are other factors at play that we shan’t deny. Read More…
HERE IT IS! An account of the protests of October 15, 2009.
There are moments in anybody’s life where you walk the line between the sane and insane— where putting yourself into a situation so full of bullshit might actually drag you into a less-then-noble cause that you didn’t even see coming. Imagine being surrounded by so many diametrically opposed view points that its hard to distinguish which side ANY of them were really on.
Many Tea Parties have been exactly that— “Tea Parties,” but as your Editor and his humble but genius friend experienced on that fateful evening of October 15, this is not always the case.
These people are fucking cannibals. They are nothing short of man-flesh-eating wombats sent from the Mayans to initiate the end of days. We dealt with more crazies than should ever be allotted to anybody for any period of time— and survived.
Any asshole with a mouth on their face had no problem telling you all about their cause. It is the most compelling argument against Freedom of Assembly that has ever been made.
This was a 5 tier protest. You had the Freepers (obviously) garbed with signs reading simply amazing things— but they were far from alone. Down the block, some even intermingled, were the anti-war people. They even had a band! (No I did not get a photo of that). All in all they were insane.
BUT WE CANNOT STOP THERE! Behind the anti-war protesters were the Global Warming folks. They were all wearing red tee-shirts and were honestly the laziest demonstrators your Editor has ever seen. They just stood around in a circle with their signs stating “STOP GLOBAL WARMING” strewn together against a concrete divide. It was sad.
Around the bend from the Global Warming people were the BEST 9/11 TRUTHERS EVER, covered with microphones and screaming things that sounded about as insanely powerful as The Battle Hymn of the Republic. Not only were they loud, they were armed with pamphlets and pandering like mad homeless dogs. Sound like fun? WELL HERE ARE THE PHOTOS (taken with a cell phone, of course).
Yes, this is a special day for everyone. From 4 to 8 p.m. your Teablogging’s own shortsshortsshorts will be walking among the piles of people at the St. Francis Hotel for Obama’s one day “Presidential” visit, IF WE CAN EVEN CALL HIM THE PRESIDENT.
Let’s explore what your Editor will be taking photos and video of this evening, for sport:
The National Tea Party Coalition presents to you— INSANITY! Get your tin-foil hat out, because these “radicals” will stop at nothing to spread the word. Introducing the Conservative Radical University, a group founded by everybody’s favorite sore, Michael Patrick Leahy.
We should have seen this coming. One would think the ideas behind the ridiculous tea party platform would be fairly easy to grasp. For example:
1. Scream a lot.
2. Wave a sign in the air and shake your fist.
3. Make sure the sign says something like “GO BACK TO AFRICA,” and
Catherine Crabill, some Republican Nominee for the 99th Congressional District of Virginia IS OUT OF HER MIND. In this video, she speaks to her Tea Party friends in the “resolution style” which has become very popular among Teabaggers. That is to say every sentence begins with “Whereas” and is followed by insane banter. Here is a quote for your enjoyment:
“We have the chance to fight this battle at the ballot box before we have to resort to the bullet box… That’s the beauty of our 2nd Amend rights.”
So remember, anybody who disagrees with the Teabaggers… YOU WILL BE SHOT AND KILLED after election day. Isn’t that nice?
Michael Simonedemands your attendance to an online “Tea Party” happening all over the Internet on Saturday, at 12:00 p.m.
It should be noted that the man really, truly enjoys the word “Tea Party.” We are not sure it he knows what the movement is. Take this for an example:
TEA PARTY TEA PARTY TEA PARTY TEA PARTY TEA PARTY TEA PARTY TEA PARTY TEA PARTY TEA PARTY TEA PARTY TEA PARTY TEA PARTY TEA PARTY TEA PARTY TEA PARTY TEA PARTY TEA PARTY TEA PARTY etc.
THE END OF THE WORLD IS NEAR, as Tea Baggers plan to call in sick on July 30, 2009 to protest, umm, TAXES! The event is truly epic. It is called “a day without a Conservative.” Can you imagine anything more awesome for the rest of us? A WHOLE DAY, without them? We should rename July 30, 2009 “Christmas,” in honor of logic’s rebirth.
Are you in need of a little testicle infusion. Phil Valentine wants to help you!
Phil runs a radio show that runs between 4 and 8 p.m. somewhere out of Nashville, TN. His father Tim was actually a DEMOCRATIC Senator— but not Phil. No no. He’s just delightfully INSANE!
His website, which is wrought with spelling and grammatical errors (even more than this site) isn’t even readable, mostly. BUT STILL, he has a project! He’s going to give Senators his balls. That’s right— his balls.
Do you love the Constitution? You damn well should, as it is an incredible thing. Tea Party people also love the Constitution, which is why they are on a mission of VAST importance. Let’s do away with the separation of Church and State, as that is clearly how it is phrased in the Constitution. Rex Rammell, lightning Conservative and hopeful primary challenger in the incredible race for Governor of Idaho sends word. Never mind that he suggested somebody 
The National Tea Party Coalition presents to you— INSANITY! Get your tin-foil hat out, because these “radicals” will stop at nothing to spread the word. Introducing the 
TEA PARTY TEA PARTY TEA PARTY TEA PARTY TEA PARTY TEA PARTY TEA PARTY TEA PARTY TEA PARTY TEA PARTY TEA PARTY TEA PARTY TEA PARTY TEA PARTY TEA PARTY TEA PARTY TEA PARTY TEA PARTY etc.
Are you in need of a little testicle infusion. Phil Valentine wants to help you!
